You be the judge: my housemate always loses our keys. Should he pay for a smart lock?

Rami is a good mate. We met at uni and he moved in to my place eight months ago when I had to remortgage my house and found the cost had gone up exponentially. I have a three-bed and am recently single, while Rami needed to find a new place after his old landlord sold up, so it made sense for both of us.
We’re both 32 and like living together as we’ve got similar interests: kickboxing, going to the gym, cooking. We’re both pretty tidy, although I’m definitely less laid-back. Rami misplaces things – in particular, our house keys. I can’t tell you the number of times he has lost them. It’s ridiculous.
He’s lost them on nights out, or just coming back from work. One time he left a set on the train. The first couple of times I gave him spares and didn’t ask him to pay for a new set because I had loads, but after that I would say: “Mate, this is on you.” He told me it’s because his old house had a smart lock, where you key in a code. And when he lived with his parents, they had a key box. He says he’s just not used to carrying around keys.
As a compromise, I installed a key box outside the house, concealed in a little pouch by the front window. You put a code in to unlock the box and get the keys out. At first, I didn’t like the idea of having the keys right next to the front door, and wondered if people would be able to smash the box open, but I got used to it.
But then Rami wouldn’t put the keys back into the box. He’d take them straight into the house. A couple of times when I came home, I couldn’t get in. I’d have to call him to open the door. One time he went out to meet a friend, and took the keys with him, so he locked me out completely.
Rami needs to respect the key box. Now I’ve taken to carrying my own set of keys, which defeats the purpose. He has suggested getting an electronic key fob for our door. I’m not a huge fan of this idea – I don’t like how it looks and it’s expensive. Rami said he would pay half, but seeing as he’s the one who keeps losing keys, I don’t think I should have to pay for it at all.
I’m not great with keys. At the previous two houses I lived in, I didn’t need to carry them around, so I’m not used to them. That’s my excuse.
My ex said I have a brain like a sieve as I lose a lot of stuff, not just keys. I’ve lost my work phone this year and left my gym kit on the train. But I do have my head screwed on in most other areas. I cook for Mark whenever I can and I’m a very considerate housemate.
I think I keep losing the keys because I was promoted recently. I’m in a quite high-pressure media job … although, to be honest, I wasn’t working in that role when I started losing them. Mark was quite understanding about it the first few times but then I continued to lose them and he lost patience. He said, “What’s going on with you?”, and I told him that I was under a lot of stress.
Then, to make things easier, I paid for a key box to put on our porch. It meant we could just leave a set in the box as we came and went, so I didn’t have to take the keys out with me every time I left the house.
It worked quite well for a while, but then I would forget to put the keys back inside it. Mark got locked out a couple of times because he was expecting the keys to be in the box. Once, when I arrived back to let him in, he called me a “muppet” and I had to apologise. That wasn’t my finest hour.
My latest suggestion is to get an electronic fob that works with a passcode. That’s what my old landlord had in his house, and it requires the least amount of brain power: all you need to do is memorise a code. Mark isn’t keen – he thinks it will ruin his Victorian front door and it’s expensive (about £150).
I have offered to pay for half of this – it’s Mark’s flat, and I won’t live here for ever – but he got annoyed and said I should pay for the whole thing. But the fob will benefit both of us as neither of us will need to worry about keys or boxes, so I think it’s the fairest way of doing things. Failing that, I can try to be less forgetful when using the key box.
Should Rami have to pay the full cost of the smart lock?
Mark has already tried to accommodate Rami by installing a keybox, and that’s not worked out. Though Rami should pay for the electronic lock, it also seems that Mark doesn’t really want it. Maybe they should continue their current set-up: with Rami using the key box, and Mark taking a key out with him. Rebecca, 30
Mark shouldn’t have to pay half the cost to solve a problem that is 100% Rami’s making. Rami should pay for the locks – and also offer to pay to have them removed when he moves out, as Mark clearly doesn’t want them!Ian, 44
It’s Mark’s house and he will still be benefitting from the convenience of the electronic lock long after Remi has moved out, so of course he should pay half. Remi is not guilty.Cyrille, 59
As it’s Mark’s house, I think it’s up to him whether he installs an electronic key fob. However, as he and Rami are good friends and it seems Rami can’t help himself, it would be kind to go halves on the cost of installing one.Isabella, 27
If the electronic key fob looks ugly to Mark there’s no way he should have one installed, let alone pay for half of it. Rami needs to join the rest of humanity and learn not to lose his keys.Derek, 49
In our online poll, tell us: should Rami pay for the electronic key fob?
The poll closes on Thursday 19 September at 10am BST
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